There's an elephant on my face: What about them?

I haven't posted in a while although I have intended to, it gets difficult to do. This is something I struggle with, the intention to do something and then BAM! TN takes all my energy and ability to function. With the festive season behind us now, I'm still struggling to recover. Having to be around a lot of people, going out at times and just being with family while the kids are on holiday has become increasingly difficult. I'm terrified that this is getting so hard to do. I love my family. I love spending time with my family. Sometimes I think that they must be saying...."what about us?" This is something that many people don'g understand about having a chronic invisible condition. I am sure that the same can be said for any other life-changing condition too. The ones we love take on so much with this because they are close to us. They understand what this is really like and what it has done to our lives. They understand that it has changed everything.

I worry that they think or feel so many things that I am now responsible for, even though I didn't ask for this monster to invade my body. What about their lives? What about the family outings to the beach, the park, a movie? What about sport days, family gatherings? Everything ends up being a case of first checking if I am feeling ok. Is it too windy outside? Have I got enough meds to take me through the day? Do we have the money to go out or do we need that money for medication or a doctors' visit?

It is so unfair on them. I spent 5 minutes helping my daughter learn to ride her bike and have had days of pain as a result. It's not fair.

We shouldn't have to deal with this, but more importantly, our families really have had a raw deal as a result.

What about their lives? What about their happiness? What about them?

I am really grateful to them for their support. They are my strength many days when I can't see a way to go on. I just hope that I am able to give them as much normalcy as possible.