Mommy trumps all

So after my blog post the other day explaining my current mood and physical state, I thought it may be useful to share another not-so-fun fact about living with chronic pain.

As a mommy and wife, one of the most difficult parts of being in pain is seeing how it affects your family. They are truly the only ones who see every part of this journey, doesn't matter how close you are to anyone else. If they do not live with You, the person next to you right now will never know what 2am agony is like. 

Don't get me wrong. It's not miserable-central in our homes all the time. We have love and laughter often. We also have had to figure out how to live and continue chasing our individual and family dreams regardless.

The sad part is, it does affect how we do that. Something as simple as having your youngest start too many sentences with: "Mommy, one day if you're feeling a little better can you please..." ; is devastating.  Knowing how it affects her, with her empath-personality, is would destroying.

So what has me thinking about This?
I am in pain. Attacks and the ear infection are driving me crazy. At the same time my husband is hard at work writing a paper for his last module in the diploma he is working towards and the youngest in out house has come down with cold/flu. So today, being a mommy is all I need to do. Hiding in the bathroom or another room to try and breathe through pain, only to go back out to be with her. It's what we do. It's all we can do. We live our lives with and through pain. In my case, mommy trumps all. Every. Single. Time.